"I wish to speak to the merriest of the friendly wives you have lounging about. I see they are many, and friendly--perhaps you can pick much better than I?"
"It is easy for me to pick, because I am large and also friendly myself, friendly as Ganymede flitting through sorrow, friendly as turnips in cheese."
"Then which wife do you choose me to speak to?"
"The wife of your choice."
"How can I know, being of sour disposition all my life, a toad, terrible?"
"This one."
"This? She is tiny, and fragile; I am afraid I will wig her out or snap her in two."
"Then this."
"This? She hulks over me like a vast fire brigade. I have evil intentions for those who would be unto me like a fire brigade unto me."
"Then this one here, discreet, pleasant, robust but not hulking by any means, certainly placid when you get her listening to her favorite songs, intelligent too."
"What songs are those?"
"The German Cavalry Join-In song, the Taut Grunge Beleaguered song, and others of that ilk."
"They are not my favorite songs."
"Then this: she has a thousand virtues and one of them is always knowing the time of day."
"What time is it, woman?"
"Another is not the gift of frivolous talkativity which virtue you seem to esteem as is your right so sacred I'd die to protect it disagree as I might with you, your thoughts, your person, your life, your value, your danger to the infants, your danger to the ponds, your intrinsic luminosity (lack of same), and your terrible habits dooming the race of men."
"Another woman would be nice at this point to see if same might become me."
"This one."
"I'll take her.
"Now I am walking home and there is a strange breeze in the air. It is very enjoyable, after a fashion, for it reminds me of customs and habits long out of my mind--by that, dear wife, I do not mean I'm out of my mind--but it is very cold and I feel I might die from the chill in the air and if you do not provide me with warmth I might blame that on you.
"I see you are holding my words in the highest esteem. The look on your face reminds me of a very intense look that the Arabs use at times to signify pleasure intelligently taken. Perhaps that is good, and perhaps there will be a very long todo, our lives a-squirming, our piecemeal manitous lingering over a happy fire, and God glimmering shadowily in the gloaming.
"I am cold! There are solutions to cold, I have heard. One is to practice the great Eastern sciences. The other is to retreat into special Western warmths. Oh, there is a third, and that one is very nice, perhaps that is really the way for me. Onwards! Onwards!"